One of the most challenging myths about grief is the idea that we have to “be strong”—for ourselves or for the people around us. It’s a message many of us absorb early on: don’t cry, keep it together, stay tough. But underneath this pressure to appear strong is often a quiet suffering—one that disconnects us from our needs, our healing, and the people who want to support us.
The Weight of Suppressed Emotions: A Muscle Analogy
Imagine walking into a gym and trying to lift a heavy weight without ever having trained your muscles. You wouldn’t expect strength to appear out of nowhere—you’d risk hurting yourself. The same is true with grief. If we don’t give ourselves space to build emotional resilience—to feel and process as we go—then “being strong” becomes a mask we wear, while the weight underneath continues to grow.
Carrying that kind of emotional load alone, without support or release, can lead to exhaustion, burnout, and emotional injury.
The Pressure to Be “Okay” and Keep Going
Many people feel like they have to hold it all together—not just for themselves, but for everyone else too. Maybe you’ve been told things like “stay strong for your kids,” or “they need you to be the rock right now.” And while it’s natural to want to protect those we love, ignoring your own grief in the process only deepens the pain.
Suppressing emotions might get you through the day, but it can also create long-term stress, anxiety, and even physical symptoms. There’s nothing noble about bottling it all up—especially when what you really need is care and connection.
Embracing Vulnerability
Strength isn’t about silence. It’s about honesty. Real strength looks like reaching out, crying when you need to, and allowing others to see you as you are. Vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s a sign that you’re human. And when you give yourself permission to show up honestly in your grief, you begin to make room for healing.
Giving Yourself Space to Process
Being strong doesn’t mean doing it all on your own. It means having the courage to feel what’s real and to take the next step forward—even if that step is asking for help. When you give yourself the time and support to process your loss, you’re not only helping yourself—you’re modeling something powerful for the people around you: that healing is possible when we stop pretending we’re fine and start telling the truth.
Grief isn’t a test of endurance. It’s a tender process that requires compassion, reflection, and care. Releasing the myth that you must always “be strong” can create space for real healing—and connection.
Let’s Heal Together
You don’t have to carry this alone.
Download our Comprehensive Grief Assessment, our FREE Grief Recovery 101 Guide or dive into our Grief 201 Guide + Audiobook Together, we’ll explore how these beliefs are shaping your grief—and begin creating a path forward that honors both your loss and your capacity to heal.
The first step is often the hardest—but it’s also the one that opens the door.
Let’s take it together.